Lifestyle Rules & Etiquette

Etiquette is the foundation of the lifestyle. It keeps the community safe, respectful, and fun. Most of it comes down to three things: consent, communication, and courtesy.

Ask before you touch. This is the golden rule. Enthusiastic, verbal consent is always required — every time, with every person. A yes at the start of the night isn't a yes for everything that follows. If you're ever unsure, ask.

Respect boundaries — including "no." A no is never an insult; it's just a preference. Accept it gracefully, without pressure or a guilt trip. The same goes for your own limits: you can say no to anything, at any time, without explanation.

Treat couples as a unit. When approaching a couple, be friendly to both partners and never try to isolate one. If you're interested, make the approach together and let the couple decide together.

Be discreet. What happens at a party stays at a party. Don't out other members, don't photograph people without permission, and keep details private.

Practice good hygiene and grooming. It's a sign of respect for your play partners and is expected at every event.

Don't overdrink. A drink or two can ease nerves, but drunk play is risky play. Stay present and in control.

Finally, say thank you. Whether you played or just socialized, a warm goodbye builds your reputation in the community. A great icebreaker helps too — bringing a couples' party game signals you're fun and thoughtful. In the lifestyle, your character is your currency — protect it.